Coke Legacy 9.2

[psychoticnuance]

I could’ve picked a better spot to put the easel because the idiots of the house can’t correctly get off of the computer chair without complaining about people being in the way. even though there’s totally enough room to get through.



Thanks Dante, we really needed the magic of the Slap Dance infesting this household.



Otis: You should stop. You should really, really stop this.



Ewan still hates Dante. Probably because he hasn’t gotten over being butthurt about Luna not being heir. They barely have any positive interactions because he keeps rejecting the majority of them like the massive incestuous douchebag he is. Poor Dante.



Dawn: I bet Otis is our dad.
Sandra: Our dad is a cat, everything makes sense now.



Sandra: EW, YOU WERE GOING TO TOUCH ME!!
Marcellus: I… I was just going to friendly tickle you…
Dawn: lol but she hates that.



Sandra: What’chu gonna do now? Cry like a big baby?
Marcellus: ……… yeah.



At this point, everyone who makes these kind of calls can just go fuck right off.

Except for Amanda. We always have time for Amanda.



I bet when Ludwig asks his coworkers if they want to visit his home for a little while, the only thought that goes through their mind is that he’s the one with the unbelievably shitty brother because Nate does this every single time. You’d think they’d just stop coming over sooner or later, but they just never learn.



Ewan: I’m going to lie down next to Athena and prevent Dante from sleeping next to her because I’m so mature like that.



I was preparing myself for this moment, but as it turns out I was totally not prepared at all. ):



Me too, Marcellus.



BYE SWEETIE, I LOVE YOU.



Otis: [crying cat noises]
Marcellus: [crying Marcellus noises]



Dante is also super upset about Ludwig's death, how about Ewan and Athena?



They don't care.



Nate: BUT I CAN’T LIVE WITHOUT LUDWIG… HE IS MY LIFE. WITHOUT HIM, MY SOUL IS NO LONGER COMPLETE.

Well, you WERE supposed to go first, all things considering… I’m not sure why Ludwig did instead. The game just has this was of cruelly messing with me.



Athena: Okay, it’s been only five minutes, but let’s gossip about who just died.
Nate: [SOBBING LOUDER]



I know you want to resurrect Ludwig, but you can’t... ):

I feel like I should make them in another neighborhood where they're allowed to be bros 5ever.



I accidentally forgot that Athena actually has a career-related LTW throughout the baby making process, so I got her a job in the Medicine career to give her another thing to occupy her during the day.





Marcellus: Hey, let’s play a punching game that won’t have any negative outcome at all! :D
Nate: Oh sweet, I get to punch my nephew!!



There’s no way that wasn’t going to happen.



Sandra: Hi dad, your other daughter would like to dance with you too!
Dante: [ignores]
Sandra: … please?



Dante is dangerously swinging his fragile child around, but it’s okay because an ambulance is here just in case he accidentally lets go.



I would be sad about this, although now he can be with Ludwig in the afterlife, so it’s all good.



Ewan: BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!



Dawn was jump roping outside for hours, and when I checked on her she had maximum Body skill points… alright.



At the same time, Sandra befriends a wolf with glowing eyes which will probably bite her face off at any given moment, while her father is none the wiser.

I should probably be paying more attention to what the twins are doing from now on.



SO THEN THEY GREW UP, and all three children impulsively decided to smustle in the extremely narrow hallway like the assholes they were bred to be.



Dawn on the left, Sandra on the right.

This is where I would post their stats, but I forgot to screenshot them because I'm a huge failure this update. The only thing I remember is that Dawn rolled Popularity and wants to be a radical criminal.



NO WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT WHILE DANTE IS IN THE ROOM???



Dante: I THOUGHT WE HAD SOMETHING SPECIAL… ):
Athena: i think u need 2 calm your tits.
Ewan: Did you only realize this because you’re wearing a thinking cap?



Dante, you’re way too nice to be apologizing to someone who cheated on you just a minute ago.



WOW, UH... OKAY GUYS, TOTALLY DISREGARD DANTE STANDING THERE AS YOU FURIOUSLY MAKE OUT.

They’re literally the worst. I can’t think of anything that can top that caliber of douchebaggery.



Sandra: I wish I had a best friend… ):

Maybe you shouldn’t have been a little brat to him earlier.



While Sandra is off being friendless and alone, everyone Dawn comes into contact with loves her instantly. She is not only the favorite twin to her father, but to everyone else in the whole neighborhood.



Or maybe it’s just because Sandra won’t leave the goddamn bass alone for even a second to consider socializing.



You can’t see it, but she was just leaving the room when they started gossiping about her. They are truly the best siblings.



Townie: ... Oh man, I can see up her skirt!!



Sandra: There's a high chance that you're the kind of pervert that nobody has warned me about, but I'm in severe need of friends and will take Anything.



Ewan: I ruin marriages. (:





I warned you about stairs, bro.



Dawn: There's a shitty cemetery out back, you wanna go chill in it?
Townie: SURE, DEAD PEOPLE ARE SUPER RAD!!



I like how I don't even have to prove that Marcellus is a loser because the game does it for me.



Marcellus: Trash can, I am so sad. ):
Trash can: Trash cans don't care about your problems.



I sent Dawn over to go cheer Marcellus up a little, but he wasn't having any of it.



Even the cheerfulness of the Slap Dance isn't enough to reverse the failure that is his life.



Sandra: Why are there a million cakes in the fridge?
Ewan: CAKES FOR THE CAKE GOD!



Ewan really likes cake, look how happy he is.



Ah yes, staying up all night and going to bed at 6AM. Sounds like what I do.



I sent Marcellus off to college because he was getting close to age transi--GET IN THE HOUSE, YOU IDIOT!!



I was trying to get these two to ~rekindle their marriage~ but it was way more annoying than I thought.



Ewan: My vampire senses are telling me that shit is going down, but I must finish these curtains.



This whole pointless ordeal has made it so that there's never going to be a chance for them to get along. Ever.





????????????



Dante: GRANDMA IS DEEEEEEEEEEAD!!
Athena: That's nice, honey.



Dawn wanted to have a snowball fight, so I let her and Dante frolic in the snow.



I think you frolicked too much, dear.



Dawn: help.
Sandra: ...



Sandra: Dumb bitch.



Dante is back to obsessing over Athena and Ewan isn't. All is right with the world once again.





I let Ewan go on a date with some random lady, and apparently it made people in the house REALLY CONCERNED...

I don't know, maybe she's a drug dealer?? Or maybe Dante and Dawn are both stupid.



I feel like I've already said it before, but I'm feeding Otis the pet elixir. I love him too much to let him grow old and die, okay? ):



Dante grew up though. Now less imtimdating than he ever was before with that adorable panda on his sweater.



Dante: Hi! You smell like garbage. Please take a shower! :D



Dawn: I'M SO PUMPED ABOUT LIFE RIGHT NOW! AND PUDDLES! YEEEEEAH!!!!



Athena looks amazingly pretty as an elder~



I forget why I took this picture, but the teenager still smelled like garbage. The smell doesn't deter Dawn from converting him to one of her loyal followers.



Kids, never speed click through the pie menu. Stuff like this will happen and you will feel bad.



It is now time for college shenanigans.



... Oh yeah, I did name it that.



NICE TATTOOS, MARCY.



Dawn: COLLEGE, YEAH!!!! I'M SO EXCITED!!



Sandra: I hope you don't mind if I touch your chest ahahaha, please be my friend.
Dormie: ...



Marcellus: Who is that sexy invisible babe who totally isn't related to me over there?

~x~

I swear I'll update this post with the twins stats later. I'm tired, but I want to get this update done before I go to sleep and I don't have the patience to open up my game just for that.

Oh, and I've been thinking that since this laptop is more efficient than the desktop computer, maybe I could have a livestream of the kids in college??? I really do want to do a Sims 2 stream sometime, although I don't think I'll be doing an update during the stream because that sounds like it'd be a pain, I might not have enough pictures for an update, etc.